Time flies eh? Haha, can't believe last time i wrote.. prob right after trials.
So now HSC is long gone. Offers coming out in a couple of days. You know, it's been so long since i properly wrote a blog entry that i kinda forgot how to! hehe It's kinda funny if i think about it. I remember at the end of year 11 so clearly being scared. Not of the HSC, not of studies. But of how i would end up at the end of yr 12. Whether i would have lost so much time with God, whether i would have lost my passion. Although, i was soo desperate not to, and to give God everything i could. And now i look back at year 12 and if i had to do it all over again, i wouldnt do it any other way. Because i can say that every day was worth something. I'm not going to say, "God did it all" because its not true. I studied like it was all up to me, but trusted Him like it was all up to him. There was so much frustration throughout year 12 when i look back. Frustration at trying so hard but results not showing, yet knowing that God was building my character through it all so i couldnt and didnt complain. Frustration at not having enough time to fit everything in. Friends, God, studies, church, responsibilities. And some may not see it, but i realise that i have grown in such a huge way. And learnt so much. That you always tend to say, "I'll do this after next week when i have more time." And there is never more time. Something important always pops up, something that needs attention. And i've learnt, life is like that. Things are never going to be less hectic. You graduate high school, you go to uni. You drop your old responsibility, you gain 10 more. And i remember being so worried about what to do in uni, not knowing what God wanted of me. But all the while knowing that in the end, God would seriously lead me. One thing that touched me was when i was told that God would honour whatever i chose, whether it be med or psychology because He knows the thing i want most is to please him. Haha and it's always like this. You always know it will end up alright, but nevertheless you cant help worrying. And afterwards, it really is ok, just like you knew it would be. And all you can do is smile and say all over again, God is so faithful. So here i am. So set on med for 2 years, maybe more. and 2 weeks before med applications are due, I realise my heart lies with psych. haha! i know, everyone i knew was so shocked. People kept teling me, just apply anyway, and your options will be open. But for me, it was kind of a symbol of total trust i guess. It was kinda hard, with all asian parents not knowing what psychology is, thinking all you do is become a psycho yourself. Without the prestige. But it doesnt bother me:) And now 2 months into holidays. Yeah, i've been partying. I've been out an about pretty much every day and night. I like pretty clothes, i like to put some makeup on. And i'm allowed to. To those who dont really know me, it may seem like that's all i think about, it's not. I'm still the same me, and i love God the same. If you really knew me, you wouldnt think otherwise. I know but, i need to focus more. And i will. I dont ever want to stop growing in Christ. I dont ever want to be satisfied where i am. I realised, i really cant be satisfied by this world. I'm not made that way, and it wont ever change. Thank God.  | 
This year has been quite the routine of a year. hahaha school, intuition, home, study, eat, no exercise, get fat, complain... haha.. 
